Friday, September 10, 2010

"I like refried beans. I wanna try fried beans, because maybe they're just as good and we're just wasting time.”

Productive, proactive, prolific, the 3 P’s that every businessman wants the employees in their company to be. Unfortunately I am none of those at the moment. Right now I am sitting at a desk on my office listening to the Deftones, reading a book, and writing this non constructive (for work or in general). But its noon on a Friday and I want to get the hell out of here and this is helping to pass the time. Why don’t I just do my work to pass the time would be a logical question to which I have a equivocal response. Why? Sure it seems bad I’m apparently slacking on the job but in all honesty I’m not. I’d say this is one of the better things I’ve spent my time on while filling in at the office. While I am the only employee that has enough training and education (not in a stuck up manor) to be able to work both the field and the office, my training and education is limited that I am not as capable in the field or in the office as those working their fields respectively. So when I do have to make the transition from field to office I have the necessary skills to accomplish minor tasks but still have to leave some of the responsibilities to others. So in short I did the shit I know how and am now just a secretary waiting for the phone to ring.
Now that I’ve explained why I’m writing and also justified it, let me get onto something more important or at least more interesting. It may come to a surprise to some of you but besides writing I have also picked up an interested in reading. Kinda makes since because they do go hand in hand, but still an accomplishment for me. Just so you have an understanding the last time I actually read anything was a little over a year ago when I read the magnificent work of my hero Tucker Maxx and his adventures in I Hope They Serve Beer in Hell. Some may argue that it doesn’t count to which I tend to agree with. So the book I read before that was Why We Suck: A Feel Good Guide to Staying Fat, Loud, Lazy and Stupid by Dr. Denis Leary. Don’t let the Dr. fool you though, although he is very smart and educated he is also a comedian and by the title can tell it’s not all that serious. I read that book about a year before the previous one. So as you see my reading list is far and few between. But despite all of that I, Jeff Newman, read a book. The last time I read an entire “book” (I use the quotes because my previous entries have been disqualified) was probably about 4 years ago when I read The Bourne Identity (before the movie thank you, and yes the book is much better than the movie). I even tried to read the second book in the series but the task proved to be too daunting and I gave up (so by default the movie was better the book).
This new kick has also stirred up some ridiculous ideas in my head like that I could read not only to entertain but also to learn! I know, I know, but before you get the pitchforks and torches hear me out. While the last thing I ever wanted to do once leaving school was touch another textbook (unless it was to annihilate it some way). But I soon realized all informational books aren't as painfully boring and difficult to understand as our school books were. The people that write these are smarter (in a different way) then the scientist and mathematicians who published our calculus books. For starters they know that since we are reading these books we are not experts like they are and dumb it down for us stupid people. I don’t have to know a thing about the topic for these books for me to understand it learn right away; as opposed to textbooks I would need a biology and literature degree just to understand the index. Another upgrade about these books is that they are funny as well as instructive, and I mean normal people funny, not little puns about a mushroom being a fun guy.
Because I stopped writing momentarily I lost my train of though and don’t want to go back and get back in the grove of what I was writing so I’ll start anew. I decided to take a little break and eat some lunch and the other two people in the office stepped out, and that’s when all the shit decided to go down. Literally seconds after they leave the phone rings, answer the phone, starts ringing again, finish my call answer the other line, phone rings again. So I can handle a few phone calls, put some people on hold and then I break the phone and lost all the calls. I had to use the other phone (which was mine since I actually broke my coworkers) to call back before I pissed off our customers too bad and fix the phone before anybody got back. Not really that bad when looking back but in the moment I was pretty hectic compared to what I descried of what I was doing before that happened.
But it’s actually been about two hours since that happened because I got side tracked and went to the bank and did some more work. Now I’m more pissed at the bank then I was frantic about my mini disaster. I’m not going to get into that now because its nothing of importance, just very irritating. Its 3:00 on a Friday afternoon and all this shit is just frustrating and I just want to go home. I don’t want to write anymore, and I don’t really even want to think anymore. I just want to put my headphones back in (which has changed from Deftones to Nirvana FYI) and coast the next hour. Until next time bitches!

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