You will never "find" time for anything. If you want time, you must make it.

Its 11:30 and I’m just now getting down to writing for the day. Last week was a pretty easy week considering I had a set schedule at work inside and a rest week from my workout. So basically the two things that consume my time and energy weren’t taking up my time and energy. So today I had to man up and work outside in the snow, come home and push myself as hard as I could in my workout, and go play basketball. Now that I see it in writing I know why I’m so tired all of the time. But seriously is a bad thing to be this busy?

I guess this is a first that I don’t have to bullshit through two paragraphs to get to my topic. Is it ad to be busy if it’s important things? I sometimes have trouble prioritizing my time because I don’t know which or my activities are most important. Do I have to sacrifice my work out to hang out with friends? Or do I work out, go see friends, and lose out on sleep? I just don’t know. I would love to do all of the things but I just can’t. I made a commitment to myself that I would stick with my P90X because I started it before and didn’t finish. But is getting to the physical condition I want having friends mad at me because I can’t spent enough time with them, or any time at all? I mean what’s the point of having this perfect body if nobody ever even sees it? Ok that was stupid but I was trying to make a point. It’s kind of like the parent who works so hard to provide everything his family wants and is so committed to his job that it defeats the purpose and his family just wants to spend time with him. I don’t think I’m going to lose any friends over this ordeal but I do want to spend time with them.

I guess this is just part of growing up and have to figure out what’s most important. I’m physically exhausted all of the time and I guess my Mom is right when she says I have to stop burning the candle at both ends. I’m not in college anymore and can’t expect myself to go live It up every night of the week; I have a full time job and certain responsibilities I have to deal with now. The thing is I play on 3 different sports teams which don’t even give me much free time, or time to rest on weekends either. Maybe I have to realize I’m not going to become a professional soccer player and 1 team a season will be enough. But at the same time I would play soccer every night of the week if I could so I just don’t know. So I guess for now I’m just going to have to keep stretching myself out too thin until I reach some sort of balance.

Its taken me 45 minutes to write those lousy three paragraphs and is already 12:15 and I do need to go to bed. I just got home from basketball when I started this so I was already tired. Maybe my blog is one of the things that will have to go in order to give me more time during the day? I don’t know and I don’t know if I ever will for sure but I’m going to have to find some compromise soon or I’d going to be among the living dead walking through life like a zombie. As much as I could fit into the day if I gave up sleeping I definitely know that’s not going to make me happy so that’s one of the things I have to keep for sure. So I’m getting off now and going to bed. Goodnight world!